Dumpster stories!

From: Mark Belles <mrbelles_at_pittstate.edu>
Date: Fri Feb 11 00:46:22 2000

Ya know, as I sit back and recall some of the stupidity that I've come across
all these years, and after carefully analyzing the actions by our
brainless-brethren, I have come to the conclusion that I like stupid people. No
really, think about this. Why else do we have the new? Is it not just to inform
us of the ridiculous crap people have done that day. You've all seen it. Famous
athlete signs 48 million 8 year contract...also picked up for swiping a pair of
$ 120 Nike's at the local athletic store. Or as someone already mentioned...2
teenage vandals were crushed early this morning outside of Billy Bob's Git-N-Go
when a foiled attempt at free beverages went wrong. The Soda dispensing machine
was accidentally tipped on the to young men as the attempted to gently sway the
cola out of the machine. Or how bout the one where the kids hopped off of a 200
foot tall bridge into 8 inches of water....hey did you ever think of checking
out the old landing zone first? Oh wait...my other favorite, what about the guy
who was working on fuel pump of his 1970 Plymouth that blew his right arm off
and maimed the family cat...technical reports indicated he was smoking at the
time of the incident. :) Ok...or how bout the drunken fishing accident where the
guys got trashed and somehow drove off of a 300 foot tall dam at 45 mph. OMG
Where are all these fools coming from. My point is that we should be thankful we
have our comical, brainless, incapable of reading the manual, didn't see the
sign, wasn't looking, fell asleep while tilling the garden, accidentally blew
away the dog while cleaning my pistol, or just wanted to get more umphhh out of
the family vacum cleaner so I bent the prongs and plugged it into the 220 line (
right before the fire department showed up), forgot how they opened up Netscape
3 seconds ago and now can't remember if it's a Macintosh or Hewlitt Packard even
tho there is an Apple on damn thing, common-sense deprived cohorts. Hell, if I
didn't get to laugh my ass off every night because some asshole drove his car
through the front lobby of the local burger joint, I might just have to go and
do some stupid stuff myself. There is no end to the stupidity, and no amount of
warnings, labels, locks, chains, security, or advisories are capable of stopping
those prone to accidents. I've been warned of every possible harmful thing on
the planet by my mom (bless her heart), but if I didn't think first it would do
absolutely no good. Just the other day I even notice a "warning" label inside
the drivers side sun visor in my 98 Mustang...it read...please face the child
restraint seat so that it is facing the rear of the vehicle. It even had a
picture which clearly showed the seat in the correct position with a damn
steering wheel about six inches in front of it. If there is someone dumb enough
to load a child seat into that side of the vehicle...that kid was better off
anyways. I wonder, the guy who decided to label that there,,,is he the one that
put the Brail dots on the drive-up ATM's? My point...if you aren't lame or dead
yet,,,keep diving...if you get hurt....I'll laugh my ass off at ya, but I won't
stop ya.
mark.

Richard Erlacher wrote:

> Yes, that's true, but it's through no action or inaction (I hesitate to say
> "fault") of you're own that you're all still in one piece.
>
> I'd agree that allowing the masses the freedom to kill or maim themselves or
> others is probably sound Darwin theory, the fact that people, despite their
> poor judgement are left to boast about having survived despite the cited
> obviously imprudent actions is adequate evidence that sound judgement isn't
> a requirement for survival. The fact that my two boys, neither of whom was
> either taught or allowed to engage in such actions are still around also
> serves to point that out.
>
> Dick
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Aaron Christopher Finney <af-list_at_wfi-inc.com>
> To: classiccmp_at_classiccmp.org <classiccmp_at_classiccmp.org>
> Date: Thursday, February 10, 2000 3:34 PM
> Subject: Re: Dumpster stories!
>
> >
> >
> >On Thu, 10 Feb 2000, John Wilson wrote:
> >
> >> On Thu, Feb 10, 2000 at 06:35:26PM -0000, Eric Smith wrote:
> >> > I suppose people are going to think I'm a jerk for saying such a thing,
> >> > but IMNSHO the tragedy here isn't that the kids were killed, but that
> >> > they hadn't been taught not to do such things.
> >>
> >> I agree... My parents covered all this stuff -- they told us not to dig
> inside
> >> snowbanks because a plow might come, we all wore seat belts way before
> there
> >> was a law (bicycle helmets too), our parents strictly enforced what we
> could
> >
> >Never a bicycle helmet, threw heavy rocks on the ice to see if it would
> >break (then made the biggest kid go out there first), built forts in
> >snowplow drifts, threw rocks at bees nests, climbed high trees, had B-B
> >gun fights, etc. Had enough money to buy bottle rockets and firecrackers.
> >Made lawn-chair pipe bombs with pyrodex. So did all of my friends.
> >
> >We're still alive, and each of us still have 10 fingers and two eyes
> >apiece.
> >
Received on Fri Feb 11 2000 - 00:46:22 GMT