Fwd: A Few Good Lessons was:Re: OT: Stupid discussions about Dick's silly ideas

From: joe <rigdonj_at_intellistar.net>
Date: Mon Jul 9 10:44:43 2001

On Sun, 8 Jul 2001, Richard Erlacher wrote:
On Sun, 8 Jul 2001, Sellam wrote:
On Sun, 8 Jul 2001, Richard Erlacher wrote:
On Sun, 8 Jul 2001, Sellam wrote:

  OK it's time to stop this pointless bickering. Here's something else to
think about.

    I particularly like the one at the end of the lesson.

      Joe


>Lesson Number One
>A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw
>the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day
>long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground
>below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the
>rabbit and ate it.
>Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting
>very, very high up.
>
>Lesson Number Two
>A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the
>top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well,
>why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're
>packed with Nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that
>it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.
>The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
>Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the
>Tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of
>the tree.
>Management Lesson: Bull crap might get you to the top, but it won't keep
>you there.
>
>Lesson Number Three
>When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain
>said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and
>functions." The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the brain about
>and get him to where he wants to go." The hands said, "We should be the Boss
>because we do all the work and earn all the money." And so it went on and
>on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke
>up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss. So the
>asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work. Within a
>short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched,
>the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered. Eventually they
>all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
>All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out
>the crap!
>Management Lesson: You don't need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will
>do.
>
>Lesson Number Four
>A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird
>froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a
>cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in
>the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was
>actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to
>sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to
>investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the
>pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!
>Management Lesson:
>1) Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy.
>2) Not everyone who gets you out of crap is your friend.
>3) And when you're in deep doodoo, keep your mouth shut!
>
>END OF LESSON!
>
>Sometimes a majority means that all the fools are on one side.
Received on Mon Jul 09 2001 - 10:44:43 BST